Back in what feels like another life, I was what I consider a high-level baseball umpire, working anything from high school to travel to adult baseball games.

One year I worked upward of 140 games. I kept track of it on the rudimentary computer we had at my folks’ house at the time, and my monthly trips to the local bank with large sums of cash proved it. I once set a local record of umpiring seven baseball games in a single day just to tick off the loudmouth who bragged he held the local record.